DTBS - Chapter 73
Chapter 73: Kitty Scared
“Welcome, dear viewers, to the live stream of our romance reality show—《Super High-Speed Heartbeat》. I am your host, Wang Lulu.”
“And I'm Mu Feng, good morning everyone!”
“We really didn't expect our show to stay at the top of the trending searches for a full day and night, and it's still there,” the female host smiled brightly, “setting a new record!”
“And the comments under Qingshang and Qiuqiu's personal channels, which they just opened yesterday, surpassed ten million within an hour. You can't even scroll to the bottom anymore. At least, I scrolled for half an hour last night and couldn't reach the end,” the male host looked surprised. “We really didn't expect the popularity to be this high, far exceeding the first season. The director must be beaming!”
The show's director: Not at all, thank you. I'm scared to death.
“Speaking of last night,” the female host continued, “I also submitted a fanfiction piece, and it got two hundred likes!”
“Two hundred likes? You can't even get into the front row with that. Do you know how many likes the most popular article has?”
“How many?”
【Eighty million!!!!! I admit, I liked every single fanfiction! My hand is numb】
【Quick, quick, quick! I'm the King of Impatience, stop your crosstalk, let them read!】
【Read, read, read! Please, please, please, read the full text, okay? I really love that one】
After a brief warm-up to build anticipation among the audience, the two hosts finally got to the point and turned the camera to the guests sitting at the dining table.
Apart from Tao Qiuyun and Qin Qingshang, everyone else seemed quite happy.
Oh, except for Jiang Lihe, but everyone deliberately ignored his mood, whether it was good or bad, it had nothing to do with them.
“Qiuqiu, Qingshang, before we start the fanfiction reading segment, I'd like to ask how you two are feeling right now?”
Tao Qiuyun: “...Completely unfazed.”
Qin Qingshang: “...My heart is dead.”
They spoke in unison, their tones equally calm.
【LOL, quick, quick, quick!】
【Ahhhhhh, Sister Qiu, Sister Qin, read, read!】
【Host sister, hurry up, hurry, hurry, hurry!】
【Help, why do they look so compatible just sitting together】
“Our show has a rule,” the male host revealed a mysterious smile. “Since both of you will be reading fanfiction, after much discussion, we've decided you should stand up while reading. You can discuss who goes first?”
Tao Qiuyun and Qin Qingshang exchanged glances...
“I'll go first,” Tao Qiuyun stood up. “Which article should I read?”
The cat was worried.
Does Qiuqiu really know what she's about to face?
Staff members brought two red envelopes and handed them to the female host.
The host looked at Tao Qiuyun and said, “Before you start reading, I want to tell Qiuqiu something. Two fanfiction articles submitted under your personal channel received the exact same number of likes...”
“You're not going to make me read both, are you?” The woman frowned slightly.
“No, no, we unanimously agreed that you should draw lots yourself,” the host shuffled the two envelopes in her hand and placed them on the table. “Whichever one you draw, you read that one. After all, you're the main character!”
【LOL, this is a classic case of CP fans dancing right in front of the main characters】
【And the main characters have to read it (pulls up a stool and sits down)】
“But before you draw,” the host took out a cue card. “I also need to briefly explain something to everyone and take up a little more of your time, sorry.”
She cleared her throat: “Everyone who wrote fanfiction was very enthusiastic and passionate, but considering we are live streaming and need to be mindful of the guests' personal feelings, we have reviewed the selected articles and slightly censored parts that are not suitable for the guests to read aloud. Qiuqiu, please read the censored content when you get to it, and absolutely, absolutely do not read the original text.”
Tao Qiuyun: Wait? No, why would fanfiction need censoring? Isn't it just normal writing?
She had a bad feeling. It seemed she had misunderstood the meaning of fanfiction.
“The two fanfiction pieces that Qiuqiu will be reading are both very popular. Fifty million likes is truly terrifying. The two authors who got first place are... Uh, this netizen seems to have a rather fiery temper, her ID is 'I'm Your Mom', cough, the other one's ID is also quite interesting, it's 'I'm Your Second Great Aunt'. It seems Qiuqiu has a lot of 'mom' fans.”
Tao Qiuyun: ...
Qin Qingshang: ...
Help! Could this 'Mom' be Xia Xianglu? As for the 'Second Great Aunt', could it be that fan leader?
“Um,” Tao Qiuyun began to probe, “Can we refuse this segment?”
“No—!” The director roared into the host's earpiece: “No refusing! Tell her if she refuses, Qin Qingshang has to do eight hundred push-ups and run fifteen laps around this mountain!”
Host: ...So you're the real wolf, Director.
After relaying the director's words, Tao Qiuyun fell silent.
【Hahahaha, I'm dying of laughter, Mom and Second Great Aunt】
【Sea King Qiu's face has turned black】
【Wuwuwu, but as soon as she heard that Sister Qin would suffer if she refused, she immediately agreed. Isn't this love?】
【Ship it, all of you, ship it!】
“Since we're drawing lots, I'd like to briefly introduce these two articles to the guests first.” The female host smiled kindly, but the excitement in her eyes was completely unrestrained. “The article written by the netizen with the ID 'I'm Your Mom' is quite explosive and steamy. It starts in a hotel, playing a bit wild, so we had to censor quite a bit.”
Qin Qingshang clasped her hands together: Please, please, please, Qiuqiu absolutely must not draw that one!
The cat prayed.
“The other article, written by Second Great Aunt, is relatively gentle, but... there's a sudden burst of excitement. Alright, Qiuqiu, please draw the article you'll be reading.”
Tao Qiuyun was silent for a long time before reaching out and picking an envelope.
【LOL, Sister Qin's expression is more nervous than Sea King Qiu's】
【Hahahaha, Sister's pleading, hopeful eyes】
【It must be Mom, it must be Mom!】
【Second Great Aunt! Second Great Aunt!】
“It's this one.” Tao Qiuyun showed everyone the envelope with the words 'Second Great Aunt' written on the back, letting out a huge sigh of relief in her heart.
Fortunately, my luck is good.
Qin Qingshang slumped back in her chair, also letting out a long breath.
“Oh~ it's this article. This article managed to stand out among all the huangwen — I mean, among all the fanfiction, relying on the character settings and the slowly progressing plot.” The female host smiled, pretending her slip of the tongue just now didn't happen.
The comments section was filled with "hahahahahaha" and "deduct pay".
“The other netizen who wasn’t chosen, don’t be sad. If there’s another fanfiction reading segment later, we will prioritize your article.” The experienced host quickly drew a big, round promise.
【Wuwuwu, why wasn't it that one! That one wasn't huangwen either, it had a plot, it was a pure love story that went from do to do to continue do】
【LOL, what kind of pure love story has two female leads chatting in bed 80% of the time, and they start in a hotel playing cat tail games】
【Nonsense! They weren't all in bed! They clearly also did it in the walk-in closet!】
【And the bathtub (dog head)】
【Why is your mind full of colors! Always dododo, isn't phone talk and rubbing better?】
“While Qiuqiu is opening the envelope, I'd like to ask a question.” The female host looked at the cat-like figure beside her, smiling as she asked, “Qingshang has a younger sister, right?”
“Huh?” The zoning-out cat snapped back to attention and nodded. “Yes, I do have a younger sister, but how do netizens know this? I think I only mentioned it once, a long, long time ago.”
“Looks like you have some old fans!”
After saying this, the host smiled without speaking, successfully making the cat tremble nervously. “Does that Second Great Aunt's article have something to do with my sister?”
“Let's hear Qiuqiu read it.”
【Hahahaha, Second Great Aunt YYDS!】
【It was from Sister's interview when she first debuted, her sister should be in college now】
【Hehehe, Sister Qing, you like pretending, huh? The group members will help you fulfill your dream】
【Tattooed Sister is so fragrant, so fragrant】
Tao Qiuyun opened the envelope, unfolded the letter inside, and immediately saw something about a red snake...
Indeed, this Second Great Aunt was that fan leader from the group!
The expression on the woman's exquisite face was serious, her brows furrowed as she slowly read:
“High-level hunters often appear in the form of prey. Author: I'm Your Second Great Aunt, CP: Qiuqiu X Qin Qingshang.”
As soon as the first sentence came out, the cat couldn't hold back. She immediately flopped onto the table and covered her head with her paws.
What does "Qiuqiu X Qin Qingshang" mean?
Can't you speak properly!
Even if the author really wrote 'x', couldn't you change it to the word "and"!
Idiot!
【Hahahaha, help! X!】
【Please, Qiuqiu, X hard, I have plenty of data, my child loves to watch!】
【Is this something I can listen to for free? Oh, I'm a member, I can listen! Say more (roars)】
【LOL, look at the expressions of the other guests and hosts, help】
【Sea King Qiu is doing it on purpose, right? Why didn't she read 'ex'~】
【I think she's just dense, she's really not doing it on purpose hahahahaha】
“The timeline is one week before participating in the romance reality show...” Seeing the subsequent text, Tao Qiuyun pursed her lips and continued to read: “A trashy article about a true sex-averse plumber and a passionate, vibrant female star. The entire text is garbage, the sister is just a tool. No offense intended, the background is fictional, do not associate with reality.”
Ah, this!
Help, can I stop reading now!
She was already finding it a bit hard to bear.
“What's wrong?” The host suppressed a laugh and looked at her. “Qiuqiu, please continue.”
Tao Qiuyun turned her gaze towards Qin Qingshang...
The cat was very shy, lying on the table, burying her head, only occasionally peeking out with her eyes.
The woman took a deep breath, turned her head to stare at the letter in her hand, and spoke in a flat tone:
“Qiuqiu didn't know where to go. Since she retired from the battlefield, she would occasionally still have hallucinations, and the wound on her cheek caused by a stray bullet constantly reminded her: You are different from others, all your skills were for gaining advantages on the battlefield.”
“Relying on her physical coordination and excellent stamina, she held two jobs simultaneously. Her main job was being a teacher at an interest class, teaching young people how to skateboard. Her side job was taking orders online, doing odd jobs like moving, changing locks, unclogging pipes, anything.”
“The place she lived was a high-end residential area specifically found for her by her leader. It was usually quiet, and the neighbors were all successful people who rarely got into conflicts. For her, someone whose post-war PTSD hadn't completely disappeared, it was very friendly. Eating and sleeping were just to ensure the most basic health of her body. Qiuqiu never slept in, she went out for a run early every morning. Even far from war, she maintained her exercise habits.”
“The tail of the red snake was imprinted on her cheek, perfectly covering the scar. If you didn't look closely, you wouldn't notice it. This was a tattoo Qiuqiu got dragged into by a friend. It wrapped up from her arm all the way to her cheek. Everyone thought a hideous scar shouldn't appear on her beautiful face, and a large snake, sexy on the outside and fierce on the inside, was very suitable for her. They even joked that she might find a girlfriend as vibrant and clingy as a snake in the future.”
Tao Qiuyun's voice was clear and cool:
“Something unexpected happened during her run today. Qiuqiu encountered a female student from her class. Upon seeing her, the girl politely greeted her, then kept following her, fidgeting, seemingly wanting to say something.”
“Is something wrong, Student Qin? Qiuqiu asked her. The girl hesitated for a while before finally mustering the courage to grab her hand and tell her: Teacher Qiu, I found out my girlfriend cheated on me, so I broke up with her, but she keeps bothering me and is blocking the entrance to the residential area right now. Can you help me pretend to be my girlfriend?”
“Qiuqiu refused. Tears instantly welled up in the girl's eyes. This familiar look made her hesitate. Plus, her friend had also said that if she wanted to quickly integrate into normal life, she should try to maintain good social relationships with the people around her. Student Qin was her student, she was in trouble, she should help. So Qiuqiu told her: I can help you chase her away.”
“That won't work, the girl disagreed: She's the kind of person who won't give up until she hits a wall. If she knows I'm single, she'll definitely keep bothering me. Please, Teacher Qiu, just pretend to be my girlfriend for once, just once.”
“Qiuqiu agreed, pretending to be her girlfriend and chased away the cheating person. But just as she was about to leave, a woman got out of a car nearby. Her red high heels clicked on the concrete as she slowly walked towards them, her figure graceful and charming.”
“She raised her hand and took off her sunglasses, staring at the girl beside Qiuqiu, and smiled: Xiaoyu is dating? Why didn't you tell your sister?”
“After speaking, the woman turned to look at Qiuqiu, brushed a strand of hair from her neck, her eyes dangerous: And you...”
Tao Qiuyun fell silent, unable to read any further.
Before the host could urge her, the cat, comfortable in her position and engrossed in listening, subconsciously prompted, “And then?”
If the curious Qin Cat had a tail, it would definitely be wagging back and forth.
“A couple of days ago,” Tao Qiuyun looked at Qin Qingshang, her eyes lowered slightly. “When you were on my bed, you didn't say you were my sister's girlfriend... Can I stop reading now? It's all memories from that night, the show censored it, it's full of prosperity and harmony.”
Qin Qingshang's face instantly turned red...
Smoke was rising from the cat's head.
Ah ah ah ah ah! Help! That Second Great Aunt! She's going to revoke her fan status!
Is your Yan Kingdom Map really this short?
This is actually a huangwen told in reverse chronological order!
Will the one she has to read later also be this kind of article?
Wuwuwu, no! The cat will die.
Huangwen (黄文): Chinese term for explicit/pornographic literature.
What she has a sister? Biological? How come we never seen her💀
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