Drifting on a String - Chapter 22
Chapter 22
The well-mannered, ever-composed Tao Jin interrupted Chen Piaopiao for the second time, even though the curve of her lips remained incredibly pleasant.
"Hello?"
On the other end of the line, Gaogao tested the waters cautiously.
Chen Piaopiao didn't answer. She hung up, her hand clutching the phone dropping to her side.
She wondered, what exactly did Tao Jin mean?
If she was angry, could that be interpreted as her caring, even just a little? But why would she be angry? Chen Piaopiao tried to review her own actions from Tao Jin's perspective.
She had done too much.
First, she had deliberately schemed to get close to her, saying she wanted to be friends because her senior was so outstanding.
Then, she'd been ambiguous with her, with the ambiguity reaching its peak during the National Day holiday.
After the holiday, Tao Jin found out she was gay, but at the same time, she also learned that Chen Piaopiao was attending a lesbian gathering—a mixer.
That night, she had asked her to shower together, but Chen Piaopiao, feeling a bit petulant that Tao Jin hadn't shown up, had refused.
Afterward, she saw Le Chu's photo in her Moments.
And then, she must have heard the rumors saying Chen Piaopiao liked her…
Bringing the timeline back to today, Chen Piaopiao, the one who "liked Tao Jin" according to others, had come to Tao Jin's home and, upon receiving no response, feigned a retreat by telling her to change the password.
Three minutes ago, she had taken a call right in front of Tao Jin and arranged a meal with her own pursuer.
The more she thought about it, the more tangled it became, like a crisscrossing thread stringing together all her erratic actions, tightening around her with every breath, leaving marks.
No wonder Tao Jin was angry. She really did seem like an irresponsible, flippant junior.
And yet, as Chen Piaopiao stared at the spotless coffee table, she felt a strange sense of satisfaction. If Tao Jin's "I'm not busy" just now was proof that her composure had been broken, then she was genuinely satisfied.
So satisfied that she wanted to leap over, wrap her arms around Tao Jin, pin her against the wall, and kiss her forcefully, without a care in the world.
But one glance at Tao Jin walking over to the dining table to organize her books, and she didn't dare.
Staring intently at Tao Jin's expression, Chen Piaopiao's heart began to pound. She wasn't sure anymore. That's not right. If Tao Jin really cared, why didn't she come to the bar? Why was she so unfazed after hearing the rumors, mentioning other people's tastes right after saying "Piaopiao doesn't eat fatty meat"? And that "I'm not busy," after being mulled over repeatedly, now sounded a bit like a gentle rejection.
Could it be… that Tao Jin found her too annoying? That because she had promised Grandma, she couldn't bring herself to refuse outright and was trying to push her away subtly?
A sudden wave of disappointment washed over her, her heart sinking a thousand feet.
Her low sense of worth returned, growing like weeds, constantly brainwashing her into believing that the possibility of "Tao Jin finding Chen Piaopiao annoying" was greater than "Tao Jin liking Chen Piaopiao."
She didn't have any particularly attractive qualities to begin with—kindness, gentleness, beauty, she had none of them. Thinking of her forum account, she was just a dark little puppy in training.
Coupled with her haphazard, hit-or-miss way of doing things, it was understandable that Tao Jin would think she was insincere.
Perhaps her appearance could fool some people, but they were all shallow. Tao Jin wasn't shallow. And besides, no one was more beautiful than Tao Jin.
Should she try one more time? Explain that she genuinely liked her, but as an eighteen-year-old vixen with no experience in setting hooks, she kept getting seen through. So she just wanted to dig at every hole, just in case?
And then she'd accidentally turned it into a rain-pelted beach, full of pits and craters, a minefield everywhere.
Chen Piaopiao scratched her hairline, at a complete loss.
She went over to help Tao Jin clear the table and said softly, "Even if you're not busy, I'm not going."
I like you, that's why I'm not going. Not to get a room, not to get a meal.
Ask me why. Go on, ask, and I'll tell you everything.
But Tao Jin just said, "Oh."
Chen Piaopiao wanted to say more, but stopped herself.
She finished clearing the desk with her thoughts in a jumble, returned to her dorm separately from Tao Jin with her mind in a mess, and flopped onto her desk in a daze, staring into space. Then she opened the forum and argued back and forth with some creep for sixty rounds.
Having a secret crush was just too frustrating. Chen Piaopiao felt like ordering a copy of The Art of War online.
The dejected little vixen, whose first campaign had failed, listened to Getting Closer all night.
"I guess you want to get closer too…"
I can't guess. Sigh.
One of the saddest things in the world is when you're "wasting away with longing for her," while she's "galloping along triumphantly on a spring breeze." At the Theater Festival, the musical Tao Jin had planned and directed was a huge hit, winning first prize. She was wearing a sleeveless black Prada dress with no embellishments, but it had triangular cutouts on both sides of the waist, making her waist look even slimmer. The dress fell to mid-thigh, giving it a rather ladylike look, but she paired it with a pair of slightly punkish ankle boots, which gave it an artistic flair.
It was perfect for accepting an award.
That outfit probably cost ten months of Chen Piaopiao's living expenses. Sitting in the auditorium audience, she watched Tao Jin walk to the center of the stage, bow slightly, shake hands, and accept the certificate, trophy, and a bouquet of flowers. She struggled a little to hold it all, but even her struggle was beautiful.
Before giving her acceptance speech, the host asked her, "What are you thinking right now?"
Tao Jin leaned into the microphone, smiled at the host, and asked in return, "The official version?"
The whole hall roared with laughter. The host and judges were quite fond of her, so they played along. "You can save the official version for your acceptance speech. Tell us what you're really thinking right now."
"I'm thinking," Tao Jin's smile was radiant, "where should I take the kids from the club to eat later? The prize money is quite generous."
She looked down and gave the prize money envelope a little squeeze.
One of the judges was amused and picked up a microphone. "Tao Jin, you're a real character."
"Mhm," Tao Jin blinked, looked at her own arm, and nodded. "I am made of real leather."
After saying that, she tilted her head and laughed, and everyone else laughed too. Students whistled and cheered. The atmosphere was absolutely wonderful.
So charming, Chen Piaopiao thought as she clapped and laughed along. The forums are probably going to get a dozen new posts about this.
This wasn't the first time she had felt defeated, but it was the time she felt Tao Jin was most distant from her since she'd started getting closer.
She really looked like she didn't need love.
After the ceremony, Tao Jin came down holding the flowers, tapped the back of Chen Piaopiao's chair, and asked, "Do you have plans tonight?"
Her face, nestled among the bouquet, was as bright and beautiful as the full moon.
"No."
"Then I'll send you the address for the celebration dinner in a bit. I'm going to head back first to drop some things off."
Qi Mian, sitting next to Chen Piaopiao, stared at her with wide, rolling eyes.
"Okay," Chen Piaopiao nodded.
Qi Mian looked to her left, then to her right. So formal. It's over. No chance.
Chen Piaopiao couldn't help but turn her head to watch Tao Jin. She handed the bouquet and trophy to her roommate. As the crowd dispersed, a small kitten rubbed against her leg. She crouched down, scooped it into her arms, and checked its little paws for injuries. After confirming it was okay, she stroked it a couple of times and set it down in the bushes.
She was so gentle even with a stray cat. The grubby little thing had gotten fur all over her black dress, but she didn't seem to mind at all.
Chen Piaopiao remembered the day Tao Jin had sat on the concrete ground. Was it possible that that was the closest this stray cat had ever gotten to Tao Jin?
The celebration dinner was at a home-style restaurant near the university. It was a bit more upscale than the roast duck place they'd eaten at before, but still not what you'd call expensive. Tao Jin had booked a large private room. The air conditioning was blasting, and the air smelled of sanitized tableware. In the center was a large round table with a deep red tablecloth and a lazy Susan, surrounded by a dozen or so chairs. Other than that, there were just two standing coat racks.
Tao Jin helped the junior girls with their bags, hanging them one by one on the coat rack before taking a seat and waiting for the Vice President to order.
Chen Piaopiao sat three or four seats away from her. Tao Jin poured tea for everyone, filling the cups in front of her and then sending them around one by one on the lazy Susan.
When it reached Chen Piaopiao, she paused for a moment, because Chen Piaopiao was staring into space.
Tao Jin didn't say anything, just kept her hand on the lazy Susan and waited quietly.
It was the student next to her who reached out to take the cup for her, which snapped Chen Piaopiao back to reality. "Thanks."
"You're welcome," Tao Jin said.
The meal was very normal. But they were all young students, and after a few words, they started to liven up. They talked about funny rehearsal stories and their stage fright, about who flubbed a line and who almost missed a cue. Then they talked about how the person moving props had bailed on them at the last minute, and how the makeup artist was no good, with the foundation looking all coarse.
Tao Jin listened with a serene expression, occasionally smiling and chiming in, and occasionally looking down at her phone.
She had changed into a simple, short white T-shirt and casual drawstring sweatpants, but she still looked as fresh as a lotus emerging from the water.
After a few rounds of drinks, when the atmosphere was lively, a junior suggested playing the King's Game. The rules were to get a deck of cards from the restaurant, assign numbers based on the number of people present, and have everyone draw a card. The person who drew the Joker was the King. Everyone else had a number. The King, without knowing the numbers of their "subjects," would randomly pick two numbers and order them to perform a dare.
Boys and girls were usually enthusiastic about this kind of game, because the "dares" were a quick way to break the ice and provided opportunities to get to know and interact with each other.
They played while drinking, and the dares got progressively bolder. In the third round, the King ordered Number 2 to confess their feelings to Number 7.
Number 7 was a third-year male senior. Number 2 was Chen Piaopiao.
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