TGSS - Chapter 46

Chapter 46: Unable to Hold On

No matter how humbly Chu He tried to make peace with Liang Zhouyi, Liang Zhouyi remained lukewarm and refused to communicate, leaving Chu He with the inexplicable feeling that she was being toyed with.

During the day Chu He was locked in the room by Liang Zhouyi, and no matter what she wanted to say she was met with a refusal to communicate. After this continued for three days, Chu He finally could no longer endure it and was about to erupt.

"Liang Zhouyi, what do you mean by this?" Chu He looked at Liang Zhouyi, who was silently setting food on the table, and demanded, "You don't intend to keep me locked up like this forever, do you?"

Liang Zhouyi ate in silence, as if tacitly admitting it.

"Didn't you say after resigning you planned to do travel photography? How can you go if you just guard me like this? I also said I would go with you. What exactly are you so uneasy about?" Chu He was somewhat anxious. She sighed. Things had completely spiraled out of control by now. She had thought Liang Zhouyi would feel at ease after getting what she wanted, but in fact she had not at all.

"Heh, I don't think I could keep you tied down if I took you outside. With your capabilities, I cannot hold on to you." Liang Zhouyi's tone was very calm, as if the present state was the most acceptable to her.

"And you think you can hold on to me now?" Chu He grabbed the pair of handcuffs beside Liang Zhouyi. "With this little trinket that looks like a sex toy, or with that inferior drug you got from who knows where?"

Liang Zhouyi's expression wavered, somehow leaving her both ashamed and annoyed by Chu He's blunt words. When it came to thick skin, she was indeed no match for Chu He.

Chu He brushed her long hair aside and gave a soft laugh. With a click she cuffed the thing onto her own wrist. She raised both hands and shifted to sit beside Liang Zhouyi, rubbing against her arm with her body, her tone sweet and seductive: "What do you want to do after cuffing me like this? Why didn't you use it that day? Could it be because you couldn't bear to?"

Liang Zhouyi's body went half numb from being rubbed by her fragrant body. She kept a straight face and appeared very cold. She refused to answer the question.

Seeing this, Chu He put on a compliant, ready for anything look, even sliding her body down to half sit on Liang Zhouyi's lap. Liang Zhouyi instinctively reached out to steady her waist, her palm slightly sweaty. Chu He saw her nervousness and found Liang Zhouyi's forced composure amusing. She leaned against Liang Zhouyi's body, that exquisite face sliding up along her neck, ambiguous breath falling softly on Liang Zhouyi's reddened ear, the rim of the ear seeming to be brushed by a wet, soft tongue. Liang Zhouyi trembled instinctively and turned her face to pin Chu He's two arms.

A careless smile was on Chu He's face. She twisted her wrist and shook her hand, pressing somewhere unknown, and the silver handcuffs instantly sprang open. She easily broke free from Liang Zhouyi's grip, her eyes narrowed slightly as she grabbed Liang Zhouyi's wrist in return: "Liang Zhouyi, do you see? Even without going out, you simply cannot trap me at all."

The atmosphere suddenly fell silent. Liang Zhouyi, whose wrist had been grabbed, seemed stunned for an instant, as if struck. She gave a self mocking smile and forcefully shook off Chu He's hand.

"Then why don't you leave? Do you think it's fun, that I look like a joke like this?" Liang Zhouyi finally could not maintain her calm. Mist clouded her eyes and she looked somewhat pitiful. "Thank you, President Chu, for bestowing your time to toy with me. Should I be deeply grateful that you took time out of your busy schedule to play games with someone like me? And then when you've had enough fun you'll dump me and get married."

The word "marriage" appeared too abruptly. Chu He was taken aback. "Who told you I'm getting married? What nonsense are you talking about?"

As if catching a thread of thought, Chu He immediately got off Liang Zhouyi. She sat back on the chair, fingers interlaced as she tried to recall. Suddenly Tan Qing, whom she had glimpsed that day, intruded into her mind. She asked tentatively: "Did Tan Qing say something to you? No matter what you misunderstood, I can tell you very clearly, I don't plan to marry anyone. Apart from you, no one else in this world has a place with me."

Liang Zhouyi's heart ached and softened at once. Pain spread through her whole body in an instant, even her fingertips tingled. Though she knew Chu He was a liar, she still damnably felt moved by such sweet words, even feeling so joyful she wanted to immediately let everything go.

"Give me back my phone." Chu He's expression turned somewhat serious. She held out her hand to ask Liang Zhouyi for the phone that had been taken away. "We all have mouths. Any misunderstanding should be cleared up face to face. You can call Tan Qing now or let me call."

Liang Zhouyi twisted her fingers, her expression unchanged. After a long while she finally asked: "Aren't you going to get engaged to someone else?"

Chu He rubbed her forehead, roughly understanding where the problem lay. She explained: "Yes, but that is just a transaction, like signing a contract, without any emotional color at all."

Liang Zhouyi frowned and looked at her coldly: "You mean marriage can also be a transaction, and then at that time you'll explain to me again that you were just playing around with them and only I am the serious one? Chu He, do I look that easy to fool? What do you take me for, a little lover you can summon and dismiss at will?"

Chu He raised her eyebrows in surprise, cold sweat breaking out on her forehead. She found it hard to defend herself: "I said I won't marry anyone. The engagement is just a way to buy time."

Liang Zhouyi gave a cold laugh and turned her head to meet her gaze. Chu He's words felt all too familiar, blatantly scummy. Buy time, then what is the point of buying time, and how long can such a thing be dragged out?

Chu He sighed. The trickiest part of this matter was that she had no way to explain to Liang Zhouyi that her time was running out. Of course she could go and resolve these things, but subconsciously she did not want to waste time on them. She just wanted to accompany her as a friend for as long as possible, to minimize her regrets as much as she could. Of course she also desperately wanted to grow old with her, but she had no way at all. She was already doing what was best for both of them in her own way.

Liang Zhouyi and Chu He looked at each other, and suddenly she saw dense sorrow and regret well up in Chu He's eyes. She clenched her fists. Clearly she was the most pitiful one, where did Chu He's inexplicable emotion at this moment come from?

"Liang Zhouyi." Chu He looked at her deeply, her tone somewhat strained. "Can you give me a little more trust? About Zhou Mindan, I can explain."

"Explain? Then why can you never explain on your own initiative? You only deceive and brush me off in the moment, and afterwards you act as if I am the unreasonable one who doesn't understand you. Then let me ask you, what exactly is your hardship?" Liang Zhouyi's vision blurred with a smile, her voice rose. Was she not aggrieved and sad?

Any explanation at this moment seemed pale and powerless. That sense of helplessness arose spontaneously. Chu He suddenly realized that the line she had once seen on TV, "What am I supposed to do with you?" was not pretentious in some moments, but truly fit the mood of the situation.

"Zhou Yi, I... just wanted you to be happy. Maybe my way really is flawed. Just as you said, I thought I understood you, but in fact we are nothing. All of that was my misunderstanding. I'm sorry, I apologize to you. I shouldn't have presumed to guess your thoughts. That is actually a kind of disguised control." Chu He reached out and held Liang Zhouyi's cold fist. "But can you tell me, what do you actually want? No matter what it is, I will make sure you get what you wish for."

Warmed somewhat by her palm, Liang Zhouyi shook her head: "Even now, you still don't understand. I don't need this kind of charity that feels like pity. I need you to play the martyr even less. What I want I will fight for myself. What does any of this even count as? It only makes me feel that what you call your liking for me comes from pity."

Chu He looked as if she had been slapped. She was stunned for a long time before tremblingly lifting a strand of hair: "I was being presumptuous."

No result came from the quarrel. Liang Zhouyi reached out and gripped Chu He's face as she tried to turn away. Tears dotted Liang Zhouyi's lashes, her lips somewhat pale, yet she stubbornly frowned and stared straight at Chu He: "Right now I just want you to stay home obediently, not communicate with anyone, to belong to me completely. Since you always act as if you owe me, then I want you to keep up the act to the very end even if you are faking it! Yes, you, Chu He, are all powerful. If you want to leave I simply cannot stop you, then go ahead and leave. If you dare to leave then you and I, Liang Zhouyi, will have nothing to do with each other anymore. If you leave... don't come back."

Liang Zhouyi said the last sentence very softly. Though it was meant to be harsh, she had little confidence, as if even voicing the threat to Chu He frightened herself.

"Give me the phone." Chu He was silent for a while before making the request. "I have to reply to those messages. After all, if I suddenly disappear Chu Ze will sooner or later trace it here."

Liang Zhouyi, who had been waiting for Chu He's answer, subconsciously breathed a sigh of relief, and then was tormented by self disgust at that emotion. Clearly she was the one in control, yet now it looked more as if Chu He was indulging and cooperating with her, as if this were just a farce. But after thinking for a long time, Liang Zhouyi still handed the phone to Chu He.

After unlocking it and glancing at the messages, Chu He smiled. Liang Zhouyi really had replied to all the messages that needed replying for her, even Chu Ze had not noticed anything wrong. The only thing was that Zhou Mindan had disappeared from her message list.

Chu He glanced at her with a smile: "Didn't you see the chat history? That girl has nothing to do with me. I already deleted her before."

Liang Zhouyi: "Then didn't you say before she was a friend? Why did you delete her?"

"I sought her out at first to buy back that camera from her, and the condition was to pretend to be her girlfriend..."

Liang Zhouyi sneered: "Oh, now you're pretending to be a fiancee. Quite a coincidence, huh."

"This really is just a coincidence." Chu He was somewhat frantic. "She has someone she likes."

Liang Zhouyi remained silent, only lifting her eyes to glance at Chu He before immediately turning her head away. She was afraid to see impatience in Chu He's expression. Chu He just slumped her shoulders and tiredly closed her mouth to continue replying to messages.

Clearly the two were sitting together, yet wisps of estrangement began to appear. Chu He was somewhat baffled. She did not understand from when it had started that she could no longer see through Liang Zhouyi, when this was someone she should know better than anyone.

A message from Chu Ze came at this moment, only two words: "Open the door."

Liang Zhouyi seemed to sense something wrong in Chu He's expression. She leaned over to look at the phone screen. That message was glaringly displayed before them.

Chu He and Liang Zhouyi exchanged a glance and saw their own reflections in each other's eyes. Chu He was wearing that loose sleepwear, the mottled marks on her neck had not yet completely faded. Liang Zhouyi even had tear streaks on her face. Neither of them looked very pleasant.

Chu He's fingertips tapped the screen a few times. She quickly found a turtleneck sweater to pull on, checked in the mirror that apart from a somewhat pale face there was nothing else wrong, then put on that casual, languid look and passed Liang Zhouyi sitting on the sofa to open the door.

Watching her leisurely manner, Liang Zhouyi increasingly felt that everything she had done was somewhat absurd. She reined in those dangerous thoughts in her heart and lowered her head with a bitter smile. One thing Chu He had said was very right, she had indeed gone soft. There were many things that would hurt Chu He that she was unwilling to do.

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